Friday, March 30, 2007

Rise & Fall Of A Wanna Be DICK-tator

Some of you are aware of my own resident troll, Anon1 (his avatar is to the left), who was recently blocked from commenting on my blog by my adding comment moderation. Due to his hate filled comments he has been blocked from commenting on several other blogs as well.
Most of you do not know how Anon1 came to be my blog troll so as this is the last time I will ever discuss Anon1 on my blog I thought that I would tell you the rise and fall of a DICKtator.
Anon1 came to light on another blog White Dade where he attacked White Dade for having negative things to say about Jen Sterger. I don’t know who she is and this was before I started reading White Dade’s blog so I never really thought much of it. I knew that WD got a lot of nasty comments but I never dreamed that they would be directed towards me.
He kept insulting WD so much that I made this snarky comment:

Rachel said:
WD~ I think that Anon might just have the hots for you but can't admit it just yet.Anon~ Got any nekkid pix you can post so we can see if you are up to par for WD? Or better yet, how about coming out of the closet all together. You are such a coward.

I shouldn't have done it as I now know that Anon1 can't take ANY form of a joke and it spiraled downward from there.I didn't check comments for most of the day and when I went back I saw that Anon1 had responded and that my best friend Funny Girl had started defending me.

Anon1 flew of the proverbial handle and has since said some of the most vicious, hate filled, disgusting things that I have ever read. His response to my comment was this:

Anonymous said:
Rachel,Go straddle a knife. I bet you are a fat bitch with 3 kids from 3 different men.And if you can possible explain why I am a coward I would like to hear it.If I were you, I would jump of the nearest bridge and hope I hit cement. Now finish your McGriddle you fat pig and shut up.

After going back to check comments and reading quite a few that you can read here I replied with this:

Rachel said...
Wow... I don't read for a day and look what I miss. An ANONYMOUS commenter insulting me for calling him a coward.Ohhh poor baby... are you upset that I didn't respond to your hate and your pathetically asinine comments other than to say that I thought you were a coward for posting anonymously?I find it extremly funny that you were more offended that I called you a coward than the fact that I insinuated that you are gay.So, I will say it again. YOU ARE A COWARD!!! You want people to take you seriously? Post your username, blog, or real name. Until you are able to state your views and identify yourself.. STFU!!!I wonder if your mom knows what kind of sewage spews from your mouth.

After that day he started commenting on my blog. Funny Girl and I tried to diffuse his anger and sometimes we were successful. When we did, we found a relatively interesting guy.
Anon1 comes from a well off relatively well known family in Florida. He currently has an up and coming consulting business and is extremely Republican and you can almost always rely on him to refer to things that he doesn’t agree with as “liberal bullshit” even when it has nothing to do with politics.
He works out avidly and has a penchant for strippers but definitely doesn’t like to have fingers shoved in his bum.
Anon1 moved from being a nasty commentor and having a guest post on White Dade's blog to having his own blog for a short time. He even invited White Dade to his parent's Christmas party and then started his own blog. After a few months he removed his blog and went back to his blog trolling ways.
Dealing with Anon1 is very frustrating for me. There is a part of me that enjoys reading the crap that he writes because usually he is so off base that it is laughable. Funny Girl, in the past, would intentionally rile him to see what his reaction would be. She liked to refer to it as poking a badger with a stick.
Other times it seems that he knows the exact buttons to push to get me riled up and even sometimes he has made comments that have hurt me deeply. He seems to derive particular pleasure from insulting my weight and my status as a single parent and has often referred to D as “unwanted” and “a bastard”.
After I started moderating comments on my blog he tried to contact me via G-Chat but I didn’t reply to him. Then he started to chat with Funny Girl and was whining to her that I moderated comments.
Funny Girl had to ban him from her blog as well and so for some reason yesterday he sent me an instant message.
I was feeling generous so I responded. Of course an insult fest ensued and after getting my last point across I stopped responding. I decided that you all might like to see some of what I and others have dealt with for the past few months.

I left everything (including my own spelling mistakes) intact other than to replace his G-Chat name and the one time I used his real first name with Anon1.

Anon1: Who do you think you are?
Rachel: The same pereson I was yesterday. Why?
Anon1: You post about Poppy like everyone else is too Blame?
Rachel: Why do you care?
Anon1: She got warts, her bad, her fault.
Typical left wing bullshit.
Rachel: Poppy is my friend. Dean isn't. It's my blog. I can write what I want. I never said I was unbiased.
Sent at 2:28 PM on Thursday
Anon1: Blah, blah, blah,
Only thing you have control of is your blog.
Sad, sorry, pathetic...
Rachel: Really? I'm not the one that has been banned from multiple blogs
Anon1: Because of people like you.
Must suck to have no one want you.
Sent at 2:34 PM on Thursday
Rachel: You were banned because of your own abhorrent behavior. Take a good look at the glass house that you live in before you start throwing stones.
Anon1: LOL
Rachel: It does suck that I am not dating anyone. I admit it. I accept it. But at least I am not having one night stands with strippers. I would rather be alone than lower my standards.
Anon1: LOL
Least I am not 300 lbs with a mized kid
Let some thug knock you up.
Rachel: What is a mized kid?
Anon1: MIXED
Get it,
A bastard.
Rachel: Next time spell it correctly and I will understand.
Anon1: OK no college degree.
Rachel: You are such a small minded little peon. I can't imagine you have any friends. You
Anon1: LOL
I am a PEON?
Are you serious?
Look at your life.
Living in a trailer.
Single mom.
Should I go on?
Rachel: hold on...I am busy for a few minutes
Anon1: Looking up my IP addy? Posting it?
Sent at 2:42 PM on Thursday
Rachel: no..i am with a client
Anon1: LOL
Come on.
Sent at 2:48 PM on Thursday
Rachel: Sorry about that. I had to take care of an issue with a client.
It doesn't matter what I try to say to defend myself, you won't believe me so I am not even going to try.
You will always think that I am a fat, nasty whore who got knocked up by some drug dealing thug who isn't ever going to amount to anything in life.
But you know what? I know the truth and the actual truth is so far from your idea of who I am it is ridiculous.
I know who I am and I LIKE who I am. And I have the best friends anyone could ask for. I am blessed beyond measure.
I might not come from a well known family and I might not have money to throw around hiring hookers and such but you know what? I wouldn't want your life for one minute. Living with such anger and bitterness is so incredibly sad and I feel sorry for you. I pity you. Even with the silver spoon in your mouth that is so tarnished by the venom that spews out of every orifice.
I would rather be dirt poor and happy as I am than be rich and as pathetic and miserable as you are.
You might want to look into anger management classes Anon1.
Sent at 3:06 PM on Thursday
Anon1: Look into weight management.
Or birth control.
Or college.
Plastic surgery.
Sent at 3:10 PM on Thursday
Rachel: I would rather be beautiful on the inside and ugly on the outside than have your "winning" personality.
Anon1: LOL
Come on.
You hate your life.
I would too.
Having a blog as the only thing successful in your life.
You know D is doomed.
Rachel: You know the only thing that I hate in my life? That you seem to linger around the peripheral edges of it like an insidious poison.
I may not be what you consider successful. But then again, I don't care one bit what you think.
D isn't doomed. He is loved and encouraged to be an honorable man. He is loving, kind and funny. He is more of a man at the age of 9 than you will ever be.
Rachel: I am done. Good day.
Anon1: lol

No longer will I allow this entity to harass me, my readers or my friends. I will not respond to his email and will be blocking him from G-Chat.

I am ashamed that I have let it go on for this long.

I am DONE!!!

Thursday, March 29, 2007

With An Ego Like That How Does He Stay On The Ground?

Last night I went out with my friends Poppy & Aria. It started out as a pity party but eventually turned into a night where we let everything out and felt free and happy because of it.
Tuesday Dean broke it off with Poppy in the parking lot of a bar. After drinking a lot and admitting to her that he was probably drunk. Isn't that classy?
Dean had texted Poppy asking what time she would be done with work and homework (she is pursuing her Master's Degree). She told him that she would meet him at the bar that he goes to on Tuesday nights with his friends.
She arrived and he sat next to her but basically didn't talk to her most of the night. After consuming enough liquid courage he walked her out around 1:20 in the morning and told her that it wasn't working out.
Dean gave Poppy an interesting list of excuses one of which was "I don't think you're ready to date someone like me."
Really? Does that sound a bit self-absorbed to you? Yeah, me too.
Some other excuses were as follows:
She needs time to get to know herself.
Sh needs to learn how to hang out by herself. (gee, I guess wanting to spend your free time with someone that you are in a relationship is just too much to ask and when she asked he rarely declined)
He thinks that she is making life changes for him and not for herself. (the whole sex before marriage thing)
It bothered him that she invited him to spend the night. (I guess that wanting to feel cared for and having someone there even without having sex so soon in the relationship bodes ill and completely overshadows the fact that he DID stay overnight. I don't think that handcuffs or force were involved)
That she dated someone for two weeks over five years ago that sold pot. (Hello! College years!)
After this ringing endorsement of his opinion of her he told her that he wanted to remain friends. Just to see what could happen in the future. (ummm yeah, ok buddy. You give her these B.S. lines and you expect her to want to be your friend?)
After the break up Poppy found out more information about Dean. After the entire issue with the HPV and him running around telling everyone and soliciting advice he continued to talk to his friends and since some of his friends encouraged him to dump her, that is what he did.
He is 27 and still can't make a decision on his own? And Poppy needs to find herself? Please.
Poppy put it best when she said this:
Bottom line: He, such a wonderful Christian boy, broke up with me for things that he was just as much at fault for, after telling me I wasn't ready to date a guy like him, while drunk in a bar parking lot at 1:30 am. Does this seem at all ironic or hypocritical?
Poppy I think you forgot a few more adjectives like egotistical, immature and stupid.
But that's just me.
To my dear readers whom I <3:
What is the worst break up excuse you have ever given or been given?

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Hump Day Hottie

This weeks Hump Day Hottie was born in Glasgow, Scotland on November 13, 1969 and is the youngest of 3 children.
He grew up with his mother in Paisley, Scotland after his parents’ separation.
He studied law at Glasgow University, where he received top grades and serves as President of the school’s Law Society and worked as a trainee solicitor after graduation.
In 1997 he saved a young boy from drowning and received a “Certificate Of Bravery” from the Royal Humane Society.
His first acting roles were in the stage plays Coriolanus and in Trainspotting.
His first movie role was working with Dame Judi Dench and Billy Connolly in Mrs. Brown.
The role that put this weeks Hump Day Hottie on the map was starring opposite Angelina Jolie in the movie Tomb Raider: The Cradle Of Life but his breakthrough role was playing the title role of Atilla in the US television serial Atilla in 2001.
He began taking formal singing lessons, training for hours a day from January 2003 to June 2004 before he was even cast for the title role in the film rendition of The Phantom of the Opera.
Rumors surfaced that he was to play James Bond in Casino Royale but that role later went to English actor Daniel Craig.
Butler plays the Spartan King Leonidas in 300. Despite mixed revies, the movie made box-office history for the month of March.

He has an amazing ability to change his look completely so I included 3 photos so that you could see the difference. Plus, I couldn't resist to put one of him in his leather thong/diaper from 300.

This weeks Hump Day Hottie is ~ Gerard Butler

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

A Moment Like This

Twenty years ago we would happily wait a week to receive information in the mail and comment on how quickly we received it.
Now, in 2007 we expect everything to have immediate gratification.
Wait a week for a document? How ridiculous. I can have it emailed, faxed or download it.
Wait for Monday to go to the bank? Why? I can pay with my debit card and access my account 24/7 online. I can have everything direct deposited. I don't have to go to the bank at all.
Although technology has allowed us to be able to access information in Tibet in less than 10 seconds, there are some major drawbacks. One of the most important one is the lack of patience in every day living.
We no longer enjoy the drive in the car jamming to our favorite tunes. We talk on our cell phone while yelling at the "slow" driver in front of us who is only going 5 miles over the speed limit.
What happened to sitting in a cafe with your friends drinking coffee/tea/cocoa while catching up with each other?
Going for a walk or bike ride with your kids?
Going camping, leaving the cell phone, laptop and TV with satellite at home and just enjoying toasted marshmallows and grilled steak?
I remember going on vacation in the family station wagon and it taking 3 days to get to California from Washington State. The journey was part of the vacation. We would stop and see interesting landmarks and eat in local eateries that served local delicacies.
Now we fly to get where we are going and miss (sometimes) the best part of the trip. The journey.
I wish that there was a day - Just a day- where we turned everything off. No cell phones, computers, TV's, video games and even cars and just lived the journey for one day.
We could do the most imortant thing that we are supposed to do, but usually mess up. Being where you are mentally when you are there physically. Not worrying about what you have to do tomorrow, but enjoying where you are right now.
This moment
This breath
This second
This friend
This family
This game
This meal
This life

Monday, March 26, 2007

Is It All Worth It In The End?

Last week Senator John Edwards wife, Elizabeth Edwards announced that her cancer has returned and has advanced to stage 4 cancer.
All of they media outlets are using a similar sounding phrase that goes along the lines of “It is not curable, but it is treatable.”
Together they decided that Senator Edwards would continue his bid for the presidency and that he didn’t want his wife’s cancer to be a factor in the election. Elizabeth Edwards will continue to campaign for her husband while undergoing treatments for the disease.
I usually do not discuss politics on my blog but this is really bothering me for a few reasons.
The amount of people who survive 5 years with Stage 4 cancer is 7% .The stress that a campaign puts on a healthy person is staggering, let alone someone with cancer.
There is a very good chance that if John Edwards is elected President that Elizabeth Edwards would lose her battle with cancer within his first term in office if not during the campaign.
They have three children, two that are under the age of 10.
Elizabeth said “I expect to live a long time. I expect us to have lots and lots of years together. I do believe that. But if that’s not the case, I don’t want my legacy to be that I pulled somebody who ought to be president out of the race. It’s not fair to me, in a sense ... My feeling is, if we gave up what we have committed to as our life’s work, wouldn’t I be getting ready to die? That’s what I’d be doing. This cause is not just John’s cause, it’s my cause.”
How would you reconcile a life’s goal with the knowledge that trying to achieve that life’s goal could cause your terminal illness to take your life at an earlier date?
I am having a hard time putting into words how this makes me feel.
I empathize with Elizabeth Edwards. She wants her husband to be president. She wants to be supportive. She feels that she is doing the right thing to continue the campaign and to continue traveling while receiving the best medical treatment available.
I also have a hard time reconciling the fact that her children with likely be left without a mother within the next few years and that she and her husband are willing to sacrifice weeks and months of time spent with their family potentially exacerbating her illness to pound the pavement to try and get John elected into an incredibly stressful, high profile job where chances are extremely high that if he gets that job he will be burying his wife while being president.
I wonder if John & Elizabeth will think that it was all worth it in the end. Will their kids?

Friday, March 23, 2007

Distracted Driving Didn't Kill Me. Or Even Get Me A Ticket.

I am a Harry Potter fan. D is a Harry Potter fan. I have read all of the books and seen all of the movies and D has seen all of the movies. The books are a bit above his reading level. They are geared towards grade 5 and above. D is in grade 3 but reads at the high end of a 4th grade reader. He will probably read them next year.
I am really looking forward to the newest book and movie coming out the July. I know that I have a deeper understanding of the movies since I have read the books and I wanted D to enjoy it just as much as I do.
We went to the library at the beginning of this week and I checked out the unabridged audio CD's of Harry Potter & The Sorcerer's Stone. At first D thought it was stupid that I would check that out but I thought it would be fun to listen to in the car.
I popped in the first CD and by the time we got home we had finished Chapters 1 & 2. D agreed that it was pretty cool. Since then whenever D is in the car with me we listen to the CD's. We are now on Chapter 6.
After we finish this book we will listen to the rest of the books on tape until we finish. I hope that we will be done by the time the last book comes out in July. I figure we have a good head start.
Today after I dropped D of before school I turned off the CD and started to listen to the radio. I got so caught up in what they were talking about that I didn't realize that I had gotten to my exit and breezed right by it.
I panicked.
The exit that I take is the last exit on one freeway and then it merges onto an expressway about 3 miles down the road. So I would have had to merge onto the expressway, drive until I found an exit and then turn around. I knew that it would have taken longer that the extra 15 minutes that I give myself in the morning (in case of heavy traffic) to get to work and I would probably be late.
The company that I work for has a quite strict tardy policy. If you are late more than 5 times in a rolling 12 month period you are written up. If you late again you are put on probation. One more time and you are terminated. Due to really bad winter weather I am at 5 tardies. I have one that will be removed at the end of March but after that I will have 4 on the books until September. So I can't risk getting another tardy.
Right after I passed my exit I realized what I had done. I decided that I was going to intentionally break the law.
Yep. I admit it. I willingly and knowingly broke the law today.
I turned into an authorized vehicle only lane and went from Eastbound on the highway to Westbound so that I could backtrack and get to my exit.
There wern't very many cars around that could see what I did and I hoped that one wasn't a cop. Apparently Lady Luck was on my side this morning. I was able to turn my car around and exit the freeway without the coppers catching me.
So here I sit at work. An admitted lawbreaker.
And I am a bit disappointed that D will be at his dad's all weekend. I want to listen to more Harry Potter.

Thursday, March 22, 2007

Emails & Updates

Today I have two subjects for your enjoyment.

Yesterday when I came into work I had this in my email account.

To: RachelG
From: D
Subject: Mom, your son is emailing you!
hi are you? :) Im trying to buy you something in Toontown,but its not working out very well.Hope you are forward to spring weather,cause it' on it's way.


My reply:

To: D
From: Rachel G
Subject: Re: Mom, your son is emailing you!

Hi Buddy. I am doing great. Much better after receiving your email. It is OK if you can't buy me something in ToonTown if you can't get it to work. I don't need gifts to know how much you love me.
I am looking forward to spring very much. You know how much I don't like to shovel snow. It is getting close to May, my favorite month of the year here in Michigan.
I love you very much. Thank you for the fantastic email.


He had asked how to use email and I explained it to him while I was getting ready for work. I thought he wanted to email his dad.
It totally made my day.

For those of you who are following the Poppy/Dean situation we do have an update. I received this email from Poppy:

We talked last night, I used a smoking and your pizza analogy. I explained it's hard to quit having sex cold turkey even when you want to wait. His problem is that he wasn't sure he could trust what I was saying (that I wanted to stay pure and had been thinking about it for a while). Maybe I was just saying it to stay with him, but would falter along the way (i.e. cheat, I think).
I told him that obviously it would be easier for me to remain pure while with him and I liked that - I liked that there was no pressure to be with him like that, especially since I knew it was not something I should do anyway.
I told him I knew he was worth working this out and asked if he felt I was worth it. He said yes a little hesitantly, but hugged me tightly.
He said he could trust me and move on, or go with that he thought I was just saying it and walk away. I told him a relationship is about trust. I asked if it was worth it to him to ruin something potentially good by thinking about what I had done, or if he was willing to trust me and see where this relationship could go. He said the latter, and I mentioned that he then needed to start thinking about me in a different perspective than he had been and move from this point forward.
I think the reason he was being a little strange when we all got together last night at the beginning is that he was still contemplating it. When you guys hauled out your cameras is when things went back to "normal". It was like a light went on and he realized this is what he wants - to be with me and work it out. Then we cuddled and kissed on his couch until 2am :)
It's not going to be peaches and cream, but we got over this bump - we can work through just about anything!


Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Hump Day Hottie

This weeks HDH was born on September 10, 1974 in New Castle, DE.
He has 3 sisters Kirsten, Lindsay and Katelyn.
His first name is Matthew but he uses his middle name and last name in the entertainement industry.
He has a black belt in Tae Kwon Do and was also the yearbook editor in his senior year of high school.
A casting agent discovered him in a barbershop.
He first appeared in the soap opera One Life To Life and was the first gay teenager in a daily soap opera, causing a stir.
He and his long time friends run a production company called Lucid Films.
He met his wife at a party given for her 21st birthday in 1997. He was mesmerized and spent all night talking to the young actress who told him "I think you're my birthday present." They were married 2 years later. Last year they filed for divorce.
He has two children Ava Elizabeth (7) and Deacon Reese (3).
He has appeared in numerous teen movies including In Know What You Did Last Summer, and Cruel Intentions.
Recently he received rave reviews for his supporting role in Crash and for his starring role in Flags Of Our Father's

This weeks Hump Day Hottie is ~ Ryan Phillippe

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Would You Love Her, Warts & All?

My co-worker/friend Poppy recently met a new guy. His name is Dean and he is 27. Poppy is 25.
They met and started dating about a month ago and really hit it off. Things started to get a bit serious on both of their parts. She met his family and he has met hers. They were together almost every day.
Dean is a virgin and is waiting until marriage. Poppy is not a virgin and has been with quite a few men (she estimates over 30) and unfortunately was not left unscathed from her encounters.
Poppy has HPV and a related strain of genital warts.
She was hesitant to tell Dean about her problem because she was afraid that it would ruin the prospect of something long term and serious. I encouraged her to tell him and be honest with him up front before they got really deep into a relationship because if they did get really serious that it could be perceived as a betrayal and could destroy anything between them.
Poppy told Dean on Sunday that she had HPV although she mentioned that genital warts could be a side effect she didn’t tell him that she also had the warts and that the re-occur about once per year.
Dean is reeling from the information that she has already given him. He told her that he needs to think and pray. What he has also done is seek the counsel of friends which is really upsetting to Poppy because she doesn’t like people to know and especially people that she may meet in the future if Dean is able to work through this with her.
Before Dean met Poppy he would only date virgins. He had extremely picky standards and wasn’t meeting the type of girl that he had outlined for himself. Now that he has met Poppy and there are genuine feelings he is freaking out that she has these issues to deal with.
I can see the situation from both sides and empathize with both of them.

What advice would you give them?

Monday, March 19, 2007

Love Is Love Is Love

Every so often my friends, Rico (pictured to the right)and Don ( couldn't find a photo), have everyone over for "Soul Food Sunday". Rico loves to cook from scratch and it takes him an entire day so these events don't happen too often.
Collard greens, fried chicken and macaroni and cheese were the main dishes today.
D and I went over to "Uncle Rico" and "Uncle Don's" around 4:00 today. They just moved into a gorgeous new house and while D was outside tossing a ball to their dog Phoebe I received the grand tour.
They have a 3600 sq. ft. 5 bedroom 2.5 bath house with an attached studio apartment that they rent out. It is beautiful. Formal dining room, living room, great room, newly remodled kitchen on an acre of land. Their home was built in the late 1800's and has all of the lovely character that you just can't get in a new home.
Later that day I asked D if he wanted a tour. He had seen the downstairs and so I took him upstairs and showed him the bedrooms and bathroom. The last portion was the master suite. I went in and said "Here is Uncle Rico & Uncle Don's bedroom."
D was quiet for a moment, got a strange look on his face and then said "You mean Uncle Rico & Uncle Don sleep in the same bed?"
"Yes", I replied.
A few more moments passed and I could tell that D was trying to process this information. He shrugged his shoulders and said "Oh, OK" and we continued on with our tour.
Later that night after a fantastic meal we were on our way home. I asked D if he had any questions. After inquiring about their lizard and fish we finally got to the subject that he had been pondering. He wanted to know why Uncle Rico and Uncle Don shared a bed.
I explained to D that most people love people of the opposite gender but that sometimes people fall in love with someone who is the same gender and that it is called homosexuality. D had heard the term before but didn't understand it so I explained it.
I told him that Rico and Don love each other very much and even though the laws don't allow it, in their hearts, Rico and Don are married to each other.
At first D was shocked and a bit grossed out. It wasn't something he had ever thought about. In his world girls were with boys and boys with girls. It was a totally new concept for him to think that some people love someone else that is the same gender that they are.
I said "Love is love is love. It doesn't make a difference whether you love a woman or a man, if you love someone, there isn't anything wrong with that because God is love and love can never be bad."
I asked him "Does it change anything about how you feel about Uncle Rico or Uncle Don? Do you still love them?"
D said "No it doesn't change anything. I still love them. It's just kinda weird though."
We got into a discussion about the term "gay". I explained that using it as a descriptive word to refer to people who are homosexual is ok but that it isn't ok to use it in a dorogatory manner like as a euphamism for stupid or dumb.
I told him that it was the same as using the "N" word if he used the word "gay" in a negative manner.
He decided that he wasn't going to use that word at all.
D knows that he can ask me any question about anything and that I will answer honestly and as openly as I can taking into consideration his age and capacity to fully comprehend the situation.
It only took D about 5 minutes to accept a life choice that was completely foreign to him. It took him less than 5 seconds to realize that it didn't matter that Uncle Rico and Uncle Don were gay because love is love is love.

Friday, March 16, 2007

I Don't Think I Will Have A Rainbow Sticker On My Car

I was taking D to his grandparent's this morning before school and we were listening to the radio. A woman had sent an email about a "friend" who's husband had cheated on her. The DJ, Puddin', was fielding calls about the email and a man named David said "You can't just say that all men are cheaters because women cheat too." Puddin' replied "Everyone cheats."

Me to D: Not everyone cheats.

D: I don't cheat. I've never cheated.

Me: They aren't talking about cheating on tests D. When you get married you promise to be faithful and only be intimate with the person that you marry. If you are intimate with someone else that is called cheating.

D: Oh like if you are married and you have a girlfriend?
Me: Yes, exactly like that.
D: I think I am going to marry Hunter (his little girlfriend at school) because she is so cute. I can't think of anyone cuter than her. Most girls are ugly.
Me: Do you think that boys are cuter?

D: No Mom. (you could hear the eyeroll in his voice) Guys like chicks, not other dudes.

Hahahahaha... This was hilarious to me. Just the way that he said it. Guys like chicks.

I have a some gay friends and I am pro gay rights. I was all prepared to be a mom of PFLAG if he told me that he liked boys more.

Thursday, March 15, 2007

Word Of Mouth

Have you ever gone and seen a movie solely from word of mouth?
I have done it a few times. Most times, the movie has turned out to be fantastic. I went and saw My Big Fat Greek Wedding because so many people said how great it was. I don't know if I would have seen The Departed in the theater without people saying how much they enjoyed it.
Of course, you are disappointed sometimes. I saw the movie Sideways and I didn't like it at all. For someone who hasn't ever found one wine that she likes it was pretty much a snoozer.
Last night, after so many people (including the morning radio DJ's talking about it ad nauseum) saying how great the movie was, I invited Funny Girl and a new great friend Aria to see the movie 300 on IMAX. It costs a bit more but I had heard that it was 10 times better.
This movie was fantastic. If you liked Gladiator or similar style movies I would recommend that you see this movie.
If you are a women, there is a ton of eye candy and more 6 packs then at a frat party. I never thought I would get turned on by a man in a leather diaper-looking loin cloth but there is no avoiding it in this movie.
If you are a man, the action, story line and primal force of this movie will suck you in. It doesn't hurt that there are some great scenes with boobage too.

Have you ever seen a movie solely because of word of mouth? If so, were you disappointed or did you love it?

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Hump Day Hottie

This weeks Hump Day Hottie was born on January 30, 1974 in Pembrokeshire, Wales and spent his childhood in the UK, Portugal and the United States.
His mother was a circus performer.
He is known for his versatility mimicking nearly any English-based accent.
He has endured harsh regimens of shedding and gaining weight for roles that he plays.
He first caught the public eye at the age of 13 when he played a British who becomes separated from his parents and finds himself in a Japanese internment camp during WWII.
He has portrayed a wide range of characters and has an abnormally large cult following on the internet.
He has been voted ad one of the “Top 8 Most Powerful Cult Figures of the Past Decade” and “Most Creative People in Entertainment” by Entertainment Weekly.
He is intensely private and although he had a daughter in 2003 with his wife, Sibi Blazic, he has never publicly divulged her name.
Some of the films that this weeks Hump Day Hottie has appeared in are Empire Of The Sun, Newsies, Swing Kids, Little Women, Metroland and many others.
He is best known for portraying Patrick Bateman in American Psycho and achieved phenomenal success as the most recent Bruce Wayne/Batman in Batman Returns.

This weeks Hump Day Hottie is ~ Christian Bale

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

I Hate To Do It, But I Gotta

I hate moderated comments. I prefer to allow everyone free speech. But enough is enough. I am not going to allow one anonymous commentor who has only spiteful, ignorant and hateful things to say keep people who I admire and want to read my blog from visiting and/or commenting.
I don't want to cut off all anonymous commenting, but anyone who posts something rude or that doesn't pertain to the post that I have written will not have their comment posted.
To the person who contacted me about this. I appreciate your insightful words. I thought that by ignoring this commentor that he would go away. What I was doing instead was allowing him to bash people that I respect and admire without coming to their defense.
If anyone has ever directed a hateful comment toward you on my blog and I didn't defend you, I am really, really sorry.
Hopefully this anonymous commenter will realize that I don't want those kind of comments on my blog and will go elsewhere to spew his venom and vitriolic words.

The 1-2-3's Of Being A Phenomenal Step-Parent

1. Encourage communication between the exes for the benefit of the child.
2. Treat your step child as your own.
3. Respect the parenting choices of the other parent as long as they are not harmful to the child.
4. Include the step child in family activities.
5. Never say negative things about the other parent, especially in front of the child.
6. Do not use the child as a message service.
7. Treat the other parent with kindness, even if you don’t like them.
8. Celebrate the step child’s achievements as you would your own children’s.
9. Make sure that the step child has their own space so they feel equal to your other children.
10. Never call the step child names or make fun of them maliciously.
11. Always remember that the child is loved by your spouse as much and the ones that you have had together.

D wasn't blessed with a phenomenal step-parent. In fact, if you add these together she would achieve a big, whopping zero.
When I picked D up from his grandparent's yesterday I asked him how his weekend was and he told me that it was horrible.
Apparently the step-monster wouldn't let him call my "fat-ass" because she knew that if D did that I would come and pick him up. D's dad was at work and D wanted to come home.
She regularly tells him that he is fat and stupid and calls me the most colorful names. I do the best that I can to diffuse the issue with D and explain to him that her actions are based out of jealousy and fear. He understands and I don't think that he really takes it very personally anymore.
I used to try really hard to not say anything negative but after 4 years of trying really hard and seeing the hurtful impact that her actions had on D I decided that I wasn't going to play nice anymore. I tell D exactly the kind of person that she is so that he doesn't take her venom to heart.
If she ever crosses the line into abuse (which is a huge fear of mine) she will be arrested and put in jail so fast her head will spin. I won't pull any punches.
At this point, I just have to make sure that my son has the emotional tools to protect himself from her evilness.

Monday, March 12, 2007

My Own Mastercard Commercial

Gas To Friends House To Play Poker: $7.00
Buy In For Three Games Of Poker: $30
Winning Two Out Of Three Games When You Are Hands Down The Worst Player At The Table: Priceless

This was my first time playing poker for money so it was a different experience. Because I am so green and half the time didn’t know really 100% what I was doing and because I had no strategy I don’t think that the other players could read me very well.
Funny Girl won the first game and I won the second and third game so Gyno-Americans (as my co-worker Dennis refers to women) swept the table.
I came in with $10 and left with $120.
Poor LW (my friend Anne’s husband) hasn’t won any poker games that he has hosted at their home.
Maybe next time LW :)~

Friday, March 09, 2007

You Are What You Eat

D and I had some fun over at Planet M&M creating our own M& M Characters.

This is Mr. Tex Kung Fu Master created by D.

And this is Cupcake whom I created.

Go create your own M&M character and post it on your blog.

P.S. I cannot figure out how to put cupcake as my avatar. Can anyone help me? It has to have it's own URL and I am technologically challenged.

Thursday, March 08, 2007

My One & Only Fist Fight

In 1992 when I graduated from high school I couldn't wait to get out of my parent's house. My mom had just gotten married and I wanted to taste the freedom of adulthood.

We had moved between my junior and senior years in high school so I didn't really know any of my classmates very well. To make it even better, some of the required courses that were senior classes at my old school were freshmen classes in my new school. Half of my day was spent with people 4 years younger than I was.

I had kept in touch with some friends at my old school and attended the commencement ceremony. Heather had invited me and I was excited to see her graduate.

Heather was a friend that I had for about 2 years before I moved. She had gorgeous red hair and Angelina Jolie-esque lips and was blessed with peaches and cream skin. She was also a very sweet person. Unfortunately she didn't have much common sense and had ended up getting pregnant during her senior year of school. She had her son a couple of months before graduation but continued to attend regular classes rather than allowing herself to be relegated to the alternative high school.

In the summer of 1992 Heather and I moved into a one bedroom apartment in Tacoma, WA. She had the bedroom and shared it with her son and I slept on the pull out couch. It wasn't the best accomodations but it was what we could afford so we made due.

She was living on public assistance and I worked at Dairy Queen making $4.25 per hour. I had a car so I had the freedom to disappear when I needed to. I spent a lot of time with my best friend Jade. Heather had a big old boat of a car and couldn't afford a lot of gas so she was home a lot.

After about 6 months Heather and I were getting on each others nerves. We were both young but in totally different places in our lives. She was a mother and I was young, unecumbered and free to do what I wanted. I respected her and never had parties at the apartment and tried to be respectful. She had started attending a "holy roller" church and had gotten really into attending church about 3-5 days per week. She gave up make-up, cutting her hair and started wearing only skirts and dresses. I went with her a couple of times but it definitely wasn't for me. Any time a church has people come to the front of the church and start yelling in tongues it just is too strange for me. Heck, I grew up Mormon. You can't get much more subdued than that.

To go along with the red hair, Heather had a bit of a temper. I am a very non-confrontational person so if something bothered me I wouldn't really say anything. I just tried to let it go and put it behind me. Heather would get in my face and let me know exactly what she was pissed off about and it was very hard for me to deal with that type of communication.

I don't remember what really set off the argument. It might have had something to do with her turning all holy roller or it might have been about money or the fact that when her son would cry she would bring him into the living room (my bedroom) and put him in his swing with a bottle and leave him here. I honestly don't remember. What I do remember is finally overcoming my non-confrontational communication style and going off on Heather. I finally let her know what I thought about everything and somehow we started swinging at each other.

I can still see the entire fight in slow motion. I still remember Heather's fist swinging towards the side of my head and the stars that danced before my eyes when she made contact. I was more of a slapper. She was a puncher. I got a few good hits in and she got a few hits on me. We never hit each others faces but hit the side of the head, arms and such.

The fight ended when we had our hands so twisted in each others hair that we couldn't move. Both bent over pulling as hard as we could. After a short argument we both let go of each other at the same time.

As soon as the fight was over I walked out the door. I didn't want her to see my cry. I was so angry and so hurt and disappointed in myself. Here I am, an adult, and I can't control my temper.

I finally went back into the apartment and heard Heather on the phone crying to her Pastor about what had happened. I went into the kitchen and started sweeping a flashlight on the linoleum. Heather said something about that I wouldn't be able to find any blood. I wasn't looking for blood. She had hit me so hard she knocked the contact out of my eye.

Within a month Heather had moved out and I had the apartment to myself. I moved back home a few months later.

I never did find my contact.

Wednesday, March 07, 2007

Hump Day Hottie

Born May 2, 1952 in Buffalo, NY
Emmy and Tony Award winning American actress.
Attended Villa Maria Academy, after which she studied at Julliard.
She has been married to actor Matthew Cowles since 1983 and is the mother of two grown daughters.
Her most notable role was as Maryanne Thorpe in the sitcom Cybill.
She has appeared in the movies Addams Family Values, Chicago, How The Grinch Stole Christmas!, Bulworth, Bowfinger, The Birdcage and Cruel Intentions.
Dmarks also has a weekly dedication to this actress.

This weeks Hump Day Hottie is ~ Christine Baranski

Monday, March 05, 2007

Wounded Winkie

OK, I know that I promised that I would write about my one and only fist fight but something happened tonight that I just HAD to share.

D and I were at the sink doing dishes and I had just come back into the house from grabbing my lunch dishes from the car. He was standing on his step stool washing silverware and I told him that since he was helping wash dishes that he could have ramen noodles instead of tacos if that is what he wanted.

All of a sudden his stool slipped back about a foot or so and he fell foward towards the counter. I heard this high pitched shriek and he leaps off of the stool grabbing his package. He runs about 5 feet and falls on the floor rolling around in agony.

"Duuuude....Oh man, that hurts" was all that came out of his mouth. Followed along with a few ouches and moans.

Being the diligent mother that I am I sit on the chair next to where he is writhing in pain and inquire to find out if there is any serious harm. Any bleeding? Anything missing? You know, the important questions.

I received a moaned reply that there was no bleeding but that it HURT!!!

A few moments later D says "Now I have to pee and I know that it is going to hurt." and he hunches over still holding himself and goes into the bathroom. I get a big grin on my face and try not to laugh out loud.

D returns from the bathroom. I say "Did it hurt to pee?" D replies "No, but it still hurts" while continuing to hold himself.

After confirming that there was no blood and that he is sporting just a scratch (he investigated, not me) he plops on the couch then still moaning he rolls onto the floor and says "I can't believe how much that hurts".

Still trying not to smile and being very serious I say "Now you have learned a very important lesson about manhood. Squishing your penis hurts."

"No kidding. Oh, and mom, can you call it a winkie?", D says. "Or you can call it the P-R word."

"P-R word?" I ask thinking that he means the word prick.

"You know, privates."

The discussion continued on why they are called privates and why you don't show them to everyone.

After about 5 minutes the pain had gone away but D has learned a lesson he won't soon forget. You squish your "winkie" against the corner of the counter while your stool is sliding back and scrapes it all the way down, you are going to be on the floor squealing like a little girl.

Question For The Masses

It has been really busy at work lately and I haven’t been able to really write much during the day. I need to make sure to write my blog posts at night instead of in the morning.
Today’s will be short and sweet.
I am sure that you have heard about the teenagers that gave the 2 and 5 year old kids pot and taught them how to smoke it.

Is it a good or bad thing that D had no idea what pot is?

P.S. I promise that I will write about my one and only fist fight tomorrow.

Thursday, March 01, 2007

My First Blogasm

This has to be hands down one of the best blog posts that I have ever read.

The Dog's Name: Everyone Knows Your Name

Breaking Your Vagina Won't Get You Hired By The Circus

When I was a kid (around 5 or 6) my family went to the circus for the first time. I was giddy with excitement. The thought of seeing the elephants, people riding on the back of horses, and being up close to lions was almost more than I could handle.
We arrived early and found our seats. We were in the bleacher seats and were about 15 rows up. My brother and sister were climbing around playing some kind of bleacher style tag and I decided to join in. I started to chase my brother and slipped on something wet. I tried to stop my fall but was unsuccessful.
I had one foot on one side of the bleacher and one foot on the other side so I was unable to catch myself. I slipped really hard and landed on the edge of the front bleacher right in between my legs. On my vajayjay.
Oh the pain. It blasted through my body and I screamed at the top of my lungs and black spots danced before my eyes. My mother grabbed me and held me while the throbbing agony continued.
As the pain subsided I was able to catch a breath and told my mom that I was OK. It hurt like the dickens but had finally petered out to a throbbing, dull ache.
We watched the performers and I thoroughly enjoyed the circus until it was over.
When we were leaving my mom took my sister and I to the bathroom so that we didn’t have to stop on the car ride home. I went into my own stall to go but when I went it burned and there was some blood in my panties and on the paper when I wiped.
I called to my mother and she brought me into the handicapped stall and tried to see if there was anything wrong. She thought that she saw a small scratch but that was it. I pulled up my panties and we went home.
When we got home my mother had me lay down on the bed so that she could make sure that it wasn’t anything serious. I was really young so I wasn’t embarrassed at all. I spread my legs open so that she could take a look.
Sure enough, I had broken my vajayjay. I had a gash between my inner and outer labia that was deep enough to need stitches.
My mom told me that we were going to go to the emergency room and put me into different clothing. She made me wear this really itchy wool jumper dress with a turtleneck underneath.
I grabbed my Madeline book and went with my mom to the car and drove to the hospital. I received a horribly painful shot to numb the area and was told to lay on the gurney until it was completely numb.
I don’t remember much of the hospital visit other than laying there in my itchy dress with my legs spread while a male doctor was stitching me up while I read my Madeline book.
All I can say is Thank God that they had already invented dissolving stitches. Everything healed fine and although I haven’t really looked, I don’t think that there is a scar of any kind.