OK, I know that I promised that I would write about my one and only fist fight but something happened tonight that I just HAD to share.
D and I were at the sink doing dishes and I had just come back into the house from grabbing my lunch dishes from the car. He was standing on his step stool washing silverware and I told him that since he was helping wash dishes that he could have ramen noodles instead of tacos if that is what he wanted.
All of a sudden his stool slipped back about a foot or so and he fell foward towards the counter. I heard this high pitched shriek and he leaps off of the stool grabbing his package. He runs about 5 feet and falls on the floor rolling around in agony.
"Duuuude....Oh man, that hurts" was all that came out of his mouth. Followed along with a few ouches and moans.
Being the diligent mother that I am I sit on the chair next to where he is writhing in pain and inquire to find out if there is any serious harm. Any bleeding? Anything missing? You know, the important questions.
I received a moaned reply that there was no bleeding but that it HURT!!!
A few moments later D says "Now I have to pee and I know that it is going to hurt." and he hunches over still holding himself and goes into the bathroom. I get a big grin on my face and try not to laugh out loud.
D returns from the bathroom. I say "Did it hurt to pee?" D replies "No, but it still hurts" while continuing to hold himself.
After confirming that there was no blood and that he is sporting just a scratch (he investigated, not me) he plops on the couch then still moaning he rolls onto the floor and says "I can't believe how much that hurts".
Still trying not to smile and being very serious I say "Now you have learned a very important lesson about manhood. Squishing your penis hurts."
"No kidding. Oh, and mom, can you call it a winkie?", D says. "Or you can call it the P-R word."
"P-R word?" I ask thinking that he means the word prick.
"You know, privates."
The discussion continued on why they are called privates and why you don't show them to everyone.
After about 5 minutes the pain had gone away but D has learned a lesson he won't soon forget. You squish your "winkie" against the corner of the counter while your stool is sliding back and scrapes it all the way down, you are going to be on the floor squealing like a little girl.